my mom 11/1/08

my mother had triple bypass surgery last week, and now has pneumonia.

im writing this blog post as i sit next to my Mother in the hospital, as she sleeps.
i have been here with her most of the week.
everyone keeps telling me over and over again how great and renown this hospital is…………lemme tell you, i am NOT impressed.

most of the nurses are as sensitive as a door nail.

there are several doctors involved……..the surgeon, the cardiologist, the doctor from the insurance group…..and they dont seem to communicate with each other too often.

we are asked by the nursing staff everyday “who is your doctor?”……..dont they know this information already?

there is so much miscommunication.
todays example goes like this:

doctor #1 tells us that Mother will be discharged tomorrow.
nurse comes in and says Mother will be discharged today.
15 minutes later, nurse then says Mother will be discharged tomorrow.
home health care representative comes in and says Mother will be discharged tomorrow.
doctor #2 walks in and says Mother will be discharged today.
i ask doctor #2 if he has communicated with doctor #1, and he says “no”.
doctor #2 agrees to discharge Mother tomorrow.
pharmacy representative calls and says Mother is to be discharged today.
i tell him that we were told tomorrow….sort of.
this is just one example of the daily confusion based on non communication.

the other day my Mother was taken downstairs for xrays, and about 20 minutes later, our nurse walked in and asked where my Mother was. doesnt she know? doesnt the xray department tell the nurses they are taking a patient?
when my Mother was being xrayed, the xray tech asked my Mother why she was in the hospital. doesnt he know? why is he giving an xray if he doesnt even know what surgery has been done to the patient?
when my Mother returned to the room, another nurse came in and said my Mother would be taken downstairs for xrays later. i asked her why, since she just had xrays. once again, the nurse didnt know she already had the xrays.

other continual questions and issues:

nurses ask “what meds are you taking”……..dont they know? they are the people giving the meds.
nurses ask when was the last time pain meds were given. dont they know? isnt it their job to keep track of such things.
nurses normally take over 5 minutes to answer when they are called…..when they do come, they dont always listen……or, they say they will come back and they never do. sometimes, they dont come at all.
the other night, “Dancing With the Stars” was on TV. at the same time, it was time for my Mother to have her scheduled pain meds. long story short, we had to wait for “Dancing With the Stars” to be over, because the entire staff was busy watching the TV.
the list goes on and on.

im aware that some issues are bound to happen…..of course. thats life.
and i am aware that the staff is overworked, and underpaid.
but, i didnt expect the mishaps to be this frequent and this blatant.
once again, i am told over and over again how great of a center this place is.
id hate to see a bad center.

and i hope to never end up here.
not because of some noble cause, or a deep inner commitment to health.
rather, im afraid of the “system” here and the overall lack of communication that is so apparent with each passing minute i sit by my Mother’s bedside.


3 Responses to “my mom 11/1/08”

  1. Seneca Says:

    I heard in a recent news article that doctors are being poorly paid and they have a heavy workload and that this is leading to a high error rate… I wonder what effect this will have on how many more medical students we will have graduate in the near future…

  2. natalie yellowsun Says:

    hi. i know the hospital system is very difficult and draining. you must do your best to stay strong and alert and diligent in the face of the beast. the workers become hardened and just see another ‘number’, another statistic…. another face in the confusion. the workers lose all the compassion that probably made them choose ‘health care’ as a profession in the first place because of protocol and insurance and paperwork and fear of lawsuits. pharmaceutical ‘solutions’. ugly lighting and no fresh air. should be called the ‘disease care’ system. its tragic. its sad. and imagine the poor souls who have no family to make sure all is progressing smoothly. imagine the elderly stuck in this system with no voice. thank God your mom has you to take notice; to put the system in check. It is VERY IMPORTANT to take full charge of any meds they give her. Understand clearly what has been prescribed and what clearly that it does. Understand fully how meds mix with other meds if they prescribe more than one thing. As an example, when my grandma was in the hospital, they had her on TEN… i repeat: TEN f*cking different pills and they couldnt figure out why she was getting dizzy spells. I researched all the meds and we realized she needed only TWO of them really. We did alot of research and showed the doctors how those pills didnt mix. WE HAD TO DO THE RESEARCH AND SHOW THE DOCTORS!! They agreed and took her off the pills and amazingly her dizzy spells were gone and she could come home. AND This was only after one of the nurses accidently gave her someone elses meds. by mistake one time! (which could have KILLED her). pure negligence! what if we were not there to raise our voice for her????
    Then, I wont even get into the depth of the story about Jimmy, my husband, who in my mind, was straight up murdered by the faulty fear-based system that is in place disguising itself as ‘health care’.
    Our world is so distraught and sick. Where is the compassion? Where is the intelligence? Has it all been stifled and squashed in the name of pure greed and science? Has it all been replaced by mindless heartless droids glued to their television sets? Are there any good answers?? Is there any light at the end of the tunnel?
    Can we take charge of our own health ever again? Can we get the ‘legal drug pushers’ out of our way so we can find true healing? I dont know. I really dont. Modern medicine has done good things….. miracles even. But, its out of balance now. Its a reflection of the disease of of our Earth; the abuse of the sacred flesh of the mother that supports us on a daily basis. Humans really are a pathetic bunch.
    BUT, hey, at least we can have hope in the fact that ‘getting out and casting your vote!!’ tomorrow will change things! ……. right??? hahahahahahaha

    boy, stay strong. rejoice for the moment as that is all there is. count the blessings. and KNOW that this ‘kali yuga’ will be behind us one day and the world we know in our hearts will one day be born again. hold that vision.
    mom will be better soon. thank you for being there with her. get her some fresh air, some sunlight and fresh pure water. make her laugh. keep things LIGHT. im sending my love and prayers. i love you ALL WAYS.

  3. Drew Says:


    I went through the same shit with Kenny. Very frustrating. The family and I had to take things into our own hands at the hospital, for we felt as if we were the doctors giving everyone else the orders. Many people in that industry are afraid to do anything. Man, I feel you my friend. Please hang in there as usual, and Tu Mama, tell her Leyla and I keep her in our prayers.

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